Let me tell you about a cow named Jive…
so… after milking the first five cows I let them out to go back to their spot, and this cow Jive followed right behind them and got out before I could close the gate. So I tried to block her off but she wouldn’t back into the milking stall, so I let her go and rushed to the next gate to block her there and open a gate beside her, but she’d still have to back up a bit to get back where she was supposed to be and she wouldn’t back up at all… so I let her into the area w/ the cows that had already been milked and opened the main gate to the milking area to make her go back in… which she wouldn’t…. I had to keep running in front of her and heading her off and waving my arms and yelling till she’d turn around, and then we’d get in a wide space and she’d turn back around again and we did it probably 5 times and after much beating and effort on my part, I got her back into the milking area, behind the other cows that needed milked and proceeded to continue milking the cows, being sure to close the gate so the non-milked cows couldn’t get through. And then I let this one group of cows out when they were done being milked, and wouldn’t you know, but Jive was the first one into the milking stalls, and she walked right up to the front stall, and the gate hadn’t latched the whole way so she got through again!!!! and so did the cow behind her. So it was much the same story, but doubled because there were two cows…. trying to get them to back into the milking area… them refusing… letting them into the main area.. opening the gate… non-milked cows trying to get out…. milked cows trying to get in…. Finally, Jive just decides, “Hey, I’m bigger… I’m not gonna run from you anymore.” And I whacked her and hit her and kicked her, and she WOULDN’T MOVE! (This is after chasing her and the other cow the length of the barn and back several times) I even body slammed into her… hard. No movement. So I got the other cow in finally.. (Venture was that one’s name) And then I remembered what my mom told me once about how she used to think my dad and his brothers and my grandpa were so cruel when she first saw them on the farm cuz they’d yell at the cows and grab their tails and twist them all around and deform them to make the cows do what they wanted. So I grabbed Jive’s tail. They’re all cut off when they’re babies, so it was just a stub of a tail like 6 inches long or something… and there was a little bit there where she was running and I was holding the tail and just running after her (which brought to mind my mother’s other story about cows, when she was holding on to a calf’s tail and it dragged her across the ice one winter), but I finally twisted it around enough to cause some discomfort and then she decided I was worth listening to, and I was able to get her back into the milking area. And later with another group there was a cow that tried a similar stunt, but not to the same extent as Jive….
But that wasn’t the only thing that happened w/ the cows. The stalls are in a row so that the cows walk in and get into diagonal stalls so the cows are almost head to tail with each other w/ a bit of overlap. Three cows were in, and one part way in but the other three needed to move up so that the 5th could get in, so I stepped in beside the 4th cow, (lots of space cuz she was in 2 stalls of space,) and hit the cow in front of her to make it move up… and it did… but so did she… effectively slamming and pinning me against the side of the stall. For a second or two I thought she was going to crush all my bones and they’d have to bring in some heavy equipment and break the stalls to be able to get me out. But I was okay and managed to squeeze out w/ minimal damage, and just the breath knocked out of me.
After them, seven other cows came up—scrawny and very ugly and lean. I had never seen such ugly cows in all the land of Egypt.
-they weren’t scrawny, but I think this semi- catches the sentiment.